Beheading the Head

We have beheaded our head.

Dethroned the throne.

Cannily canned the can.

Privatized the privy publicly.

In other words, we have a new toilet.

In America, dead toilets are forlornly put out to pasture at the curb, at least in my town (not having any alternative means of disposing of the great disposer, not to my knowledge).

It is, well, embarrassing, exposing this old friend, shockingly available for one and all to see.

There's no way to make it look good, not by art or vandalism; not by any simple means, saving smashing the porcelain to smithereens. (Smithereens, a lovely word).

The thoroughly entertaining Online Etymological Dictionary tells us a fascinating history of the word toilet, ultimately bringing us to meanings such as "dressing room" and "cloth." Shite, it all started so innocently.

But all's well that ends well.

Sort of.

p.s. I bought a Jacuzzi brand toilet. Strange. Not what one thinks of when one thinks Jacuzzi. "I'm in the Jacuzzi" now takes on new meaning in my household.