Why do they so annoy me?
Will they swarm my bread?
What are their numbers?
I've killed perhaps 28 ants today, or maybe 17. I think two have gotten away. "Gotten away" means gleefully slipped into the cabinet, running under and around glasses, cups, mugs. Smirking?
How have I allowed this to become a real-life video game?
What is the source of my murderous pleasure as I squash them, rubbing the dust of the ants off on my clothes? (Awkward question; lots of prepositions.)
The ant traps are so much less direct, so much more passive. They require a certain degree of patience -- and faith that they will work.
They are ants.
They say I am human.
Can I write this off as some macabre and quotidian fiction?
May I?
Who would expose my lies?
Showing posts with label sinners. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sinners. Show all posts
Wednesday, June 01, 2011
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
shoots shots shoots
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
'Time' Is On My Side (Yours, Too!)
So. You've heard. Time Magazine has named me Person of the Year 2006. And you.
And also you.
And you. You too.
Yup, it celebrates the blogging community and the World Wide Web (some call it Web 2.0) and all its creative and collective and collaborative (and alliterative) and communal chaos and connectiveness.
Yay us. Yay me.
I admit to being conflicted over this. I carefully pored over Time's announcement and did not see one mention of The Laughorist. At all.
And, to be honest, the essay praising us did not mention you either.
Or you either.
No mention of The Wonderful World of Nothing Worthwhile, Meloncutter Musings, or These Are Me Thinks, or the Not-So News, or The Pole Affair, or To Love, Honor, and Dismay, or Odat's Mumblings, or The Bestest Blog, or Ron Bramlett, or I'm Sorry World, or Flip This Body , or Dafathsdays, or Sheila's Thoughts of the Day, or Natalie, or HeartsinSanFrancisco, or JR'sThumbprints -- all right already. You get the picture. (The Shangri-Las: "Yes, we see.")
Alas, no specific citation of A Chuisle Mo Chroi, or Eat Your Young, or Dating Profile of the Day, or LaughMoreLoveMoreFearNot, or Monicker either.
What about the reliably and humorously observant Mist1? Not a word.
O Time! O tempora, o mores!
Hey, this is getting to read like the Litany of Saints, Sinners, and Everything-in-Between. Does anyone know what a litany literally is anymore? asks the ex-seminarian.
But as I said from my very first post, this is all about solipsism, so how can I claim to be disappointed?
Carry on.
As you were.
Who will the Person of the Year be in 2007?
You? Or you? You? Me?
The Cornflake King? [welcome back, and say hello to Crunchy Durden!]
And also you.
And you. You too.
Yup, it celebrates the blogging community and the World Wide Web (some call it Web 2.0) and all its creative and collective and collaborative (and alliterative) and communal chaos and connectiveness.
Yay us. Yay me.
I admit to being conflicted over this. I carefully pored over Time's announcement and did not see one mention of The Laughorist. At all.
And, to be honest, the essay praising us did not mention you either.
Or you either.
No mention of The Wonderful World of Nothing Worthwhile, Meloncutter Musings, or These Are Me Thinks, or the Not-So News, or The Pole Affair, or To Love, Honor, and Dismay, or Odat's Mumblings, or The Bestest Blog, or Ron Bramlett, or I'm Sorry World, or Flip This Body , or Dafathsdays, or Sheila's Thoughts of the Day, or Natalie, or HeartsinSanFrancisco, or JR'sThumbprints -- all right already. You get the picture. (The Shangri-Las: "Yes, we see.")
Alas, no specific citation of A Chuisle Mo Chroi, or Eat Your Young, or Dating Profile of the Day, or LaughMoreLoveMoreFearNot, or Monicker either.
What about the reliably and humorously observant Mist1? Not a word.
O Time! O tempora, o mores!
Hey, this is getting to read like the Litany of Saints, Sinners, and Everything-in-Between. Does anyone know what a litany literally is anymore? asks the ex-seminarian.
But as I said from my very first post, this is all about solipsism, so how can I claim to be disappointed?
Carry on.
As you were.
Who will the Person of the Year be in 2007?
You? Or you? You? Me?
The Cornflake King? [welcome back, and say hello to Crunchy Durden!]
Just me, The Laughorist?
Laugh. Or....
Else.
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