The Unbearable Darkness of Being

Started in the dark this morning.

On my knees in the dark.

I am in the dark.

A little light, please.

Not just for me. Hardly. What about young Fiona, from Australia, mother of little Laura, husband of David, sight lost in one eye and losing it in the other fast? What about her? What about them?

Remember that you are dust, and to dust you shall return.

The charred smudge on the forehead in the shape of a cross.

The mortal stain.



Of now done darkness . . . (Gerard Manley Hopkins)



Although I do not hope to turn again
Although I do not hope
Although I do not hope to turn

Wavering between the profit and the loss
In this brief transit where the dreams cross
The dreamcrossed twilight between birth and dying
(Bless me father) though I do not wish to wish these things
From the wide window towards the granite shore
The white sails still fly seaward, seaward flying
Unbroken wings

And the lost heart stiffens and rejoices
In the lost lilac and the lost sea voices
And the weak spirit quickens to rebel
For the bent golden-rod and the lost sea smell
Quickens to recover
The cry of quail and the whirling plover
And the blind eye creates
The empty forms between the ivory gates
And smell renews the salt savour of the sandy earth

This is the time of tension between dying and birth
The place of solitude where three dreams cross
Between blue rocks
But when the voices shaken from the yew-tree drift away
Let the other yew be shaken and reply.

Blessèd sister, holy mother, spirit of the fountain, spirit of the garden,
Suffer us not to mock ourselves with falsehood
Teach us to care and not to care
Teach us to sit still
Even among these rocks,
Our peace in His will
And even among these rocks
Sister, mother
And spirit of the river, spirit of the sea,
Suffer me not to be separated

And let my cry come unto Thee.

(Thomas Stearns Eliot)



Out of the ashes
Lots of green shoots today
Lots of green shoots
Watered

(PK)