The American Academy of Lexicographical Propriety and Rectitude hereby announces its inaugural list of American words to be purged, disappeared, nulled, sidelined, or silenced.
Roughly modeled on France's Académie française, which was founded in 1635 and is composed of 40 members, or "immortals," AALPR monitors, documents, and seeks to influence the use, both written and oral, of American English in both the English-speaking world and beyond. Although some of its members — the identities and number are a closely guarded secret — have lobbied for powers akin to a verbal guillotine, the organization wields no formal, or informal, enforcement powers, no matter how sharp its verbo-judicial blade.
Despite the cautions and warnings of linguists, lexicographers, academicians, misanthropologists et al., the Academy doggedly (yet not caninely) presses forward in its privilege-laden, quixotic quest to distill, filter, purify, purge, or protect the Mother/Father Tongue.
The Academy's charter limits the number of words for each year's list. Applying an arcane algorithm of astrological coordinates and geomagnetic metaphysical pulses, a maximum of nine words are allowed for banishment and eternal destruction.
To wit:
impact (v.)/impactful (adj.)
millennial
adulting
Kardashian
efforting
utilize
hack (n.)
empower (v.)/empowerment (n.)
bougie
Contradicting the judgmental "obliterate me" nature of the aforementioned word list, the Academy nevertheless recognizes the fluid, organic nature of language and invites readers to amend, rectify, posit, deposit, or edit the Academy's selections. Furthermore, nominations are open for 2020.
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