"The 2009-2014 World Outlook for 60-Milligram Containers of Fromage Frais."
I'm slightly disappointed in that if I had known beforehand about this contest I might have wisely (or wickedly unwisely) submitted a title or two or three from the reports that cross my desk (actually, right now, my desk consists of a TV tray table upon which my laptop rests).
The shortlist included:
- "Curbside Consultation of the Colon" (pleasant alliteration, aye?)
- "The Large Sieve and Its Applications"
- "Strip and Knit with Style" (not what you think)
- "Techniques for Corrosion Monitoring"
As I say, my clients can gladly top these any day of the week, with gusto, if they so choose.
Nominees and winners from other years:
- "100 Years of British Retail Catering"
- "50 New Poodle Grooming Styles"
- "Proceedings of the Second International Symposium on Nude Mice" (a winner, hands down, or by a tail)
- "Versailles: The View From Sweden" (one of my faves; a past winner; was Sarah Palin the author?)
- "Weeds in a Changing World"
- "Reusing Old Graves"
- "A Pictorial Book of Tongue Coatings"
- "Sex After Death"
- "Waterproofing Your Child"
- "Cheese Problems Solved"
- "People Who Don't Know They're Dead: How They Attach Themselves to Unsuspecting Bystanders and What to Do About It" (pardon me?)
- "Greek Rural Postmen and Their Cancellation Numbers"
- "How to Avoid Huge Ships"