Thursday, November 08, 2007

Qualified


Yesterday, a friend at lunch edited something I had just said (
"Don't edit speech," intoned Lou R., news editor, years back). Well, the friend at lunch didn't so much as edit my speech as critique it. He meant well, but it was slightly annoying.

But I couldn't disagree with his point: he caught me in a habit. I often qualify a statement of value and worth about myself, as if it needs explaining or footnoting or justification or mitigation. I had added a phrase such as "well, nobody's perfect," to a positive observation about myself. Harmless enough and truthful enough, but he was onto something. He was right. There was no need to show low self-esteem by adding a demurral, a disclaimer, a qualifier.

It's like when someone says to you, "That's a gorgeous dress" (ooooops! let's not CROSS into adDRESSING another topic here!), and you feel compelled to say, "I bought it on sale."

No. Just smile and say thanks.

That sort of thing.

Know what I mean?

I'm tired. It's time for bed.

3 comments:

Glamourpuss said...

As a Brit, that self-effacement is necessary. Unless you want to be thought an arrogant arse. But then we have issues.

Puss

Patti said...

Erasing self-effacing behavior/talk is one of my goals in life.

azgoddess said...

agreed - and i will remember this...

thanks!

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